Fireworks (6 for 1), Roadside Porn (or tractor pull) and Needing an Arc

Saturday morning was TT practice. Craig can TT, I can TTT, but somehow, when forced to go it alone, the race of truth tells me lies about my cycling ability. We left the Inn for a couple hours of being in that awkward position. It was my 3rd day in the TT position this week, and the 3rd time since 2001 as well. My ass cramped up on me, but no one cares about the pain of others as we all have our own. I took a bunch of shots of the landscape, us assuming the position (bent over) and of course, of some midwestern (organic corn?) farming.
Other than the impending thunderstorms, we were unconcerned with the 30 mph wind gusts. A quick loop around Maloney Lake and a shot out Brown Road was enough to tire me out. Back we marched into North Platte to pack up for the haul to, well, we weren’t sure where. We were on our way, but didn’t know where we’d end up. If we wanted, we could have stopped every mile for fireworks, every other mile for XX porn (I guess XXX would be too raunchy), and every 5th mile for roadside liquor and church services. After seeing the Fireworks Emporium, Outlet, Warehouse and many signs for "6 for the price of one" (is the one that marked up, or is this just the mother of all bargains?). We later saw a guy with a stand claiming 2 for 1, and wondered how can he possibly compete? In Missouri along I-70, they have life figured out. If you're not at the tractor pull, you can blow things up, get drunk enough to not care what you’re doing, and then get excited enough to touch yourself. Once complete, simply cross the highway overpass to the where Yahweh’s word is being handed out – and bingo, repent, rinse, repeat.

I was thoroughly impressed with the might, mass, and majesty of the Missouri River. Wow. It is filled bank to bank, levee to levee and flowing with alacrity. We crossed before and after Kansas City several times. And all I could think was this is a tributary of the Mississippi. Once into St. Louis, the Mighty Mississippi was earning her keep - pushing Amazonian volumes in late June. The pillars of the RR bridge were barely holding their ground and both upstream and down from the Gateway to the West, she is spilling her banks and causing billions of dollars of damage. Nature bats last and while the banks haven’t been split like this since 1993, the folks along the river might think about backing up again. But naw, this is the U.S., instead, we’ll likely pump out all the mud and water from hundreds of towns, and claim that all we need are stronger, bigger, taller levees. That will do the trick. Go for it.

The day ended an hour east of St. Louis in lovely Mt. Vernon, Illinois. We were knackered, all we could muster was a Roadhouse Saloon dinner, margaritas and another night in an air conditioned haven. The continental breakfast will likely be the same, bagels, oj and a cup of coffee that can be described as “worse that licking the oil pan under a Ford Bronco.” Tomorrow we’ll be in Louisville, riding the blustery TT course and getting ready for Monday’s National Championship TT. My goal is to not finish DFL and if I do, break the hour mark. Craig’s wants to win, conquering his past TT demons. He's got a shot, I'm not an oddsmaker, but if I were, I say he'll have to have a perfect day and his very strong class of competitors will need to be less than perfect. I've got my fingers crossed, he deserves it. Especially after finding this turtle.

Can you tell how big the Mississippi river is, how full, how powerful?